Posted tagged ‘Sweeney Todd’

Hair on my Chess

December 17, 2009

My hair was starting to resemble an untidy hedge that was enticing excited feathered birds; therefore it was time for a trim. For a change I decided to change from my usual barber and what the hell I thought, I’ll ask for the whole lot to be shaved off.

Fed up with walking through the tried and trusted streets I took the road less travelled by. This could make a difference and I wasn’t wrong. Frost was on the ground, daylight disappeared and birds of prey swooped in the air above me. Fearing for my safety I found sanctuary in this dark wilderness as I espied a red and white pole which beckoned me inside to a barber’s shop.

There were seven white men sitting on seats getting their heads shaved by seven hair stylists. An eighth coiffeur invited me to sit on an empty chair that was numbered D2. When I was sat in said chair the trimmer went to work at my hair with his bladed hands.

I must have dozed off because when I woke sitting directly in front of me in the mirror were eight black men completely bald. Startled and afraid suddenly I found myself being pushed into the mirror toward the black men. A hairless black man also moved forward so that he was diagonally opposite me at my right side. I could feel his breath on my face.

Then I heard a scraping shuffling noise and the man who was sitting on chair E2 had entered the mirror and looked menacingly at the black man. Strangely his chair now signalled E4 but inside I felt better and thanked my comrade for his help. What a Musketeer he was! All for one and all that.

But my relief was short lived. Angrily the black man on chair E5 lunged at me with a brutal attack and next thing I knew I was back on Elm Street, one of my trusty streets. My first thought was…Englund gambit and I was the pawn that was sacrificed. The wind was biting into my baldy head and so were Nightmares about Freddy Krueger.