Posted tagged ‘Mark Carney’

Great Lakes of Whiskey

December 1, 2012

The recent appointment of Mark Carney as Governor of the Bank of England would have raised a few eyebrows in the corridors of power. This is the first time a foreigner would be taking the reins of the premier banking ship in this country. To paraphrase Basil Fawlty “He’s from Canada.”

Personally, I don’t have a problem with Canadians, my wife has a niece that lives there and is doing well. The first thing I thought of when I heard of Mr Carney’s selection as Governor was, wait for it, Canadian Club. Canadian Club is exceedingly good whiskey… allegedly.

I first ran across CC when I was out on a date (pre-Mrs W, so we’re talking medieval times). The “lady” I was courting when asked what she would like to drink choose the hard liquor from North America. Tarnishing her hard reputation somewhat she said she takes Coke with it i.e. Coca-Cola, for the avoidance of doubt. I asked the barman for a CCCC. He told me the bathroom was to the left.

The spirit world has always been off-limits to me. Don’t get me wrong I love to roll my tongue over the exotic names of the chief brands: Wild Turkey, Jack Daniels’s, Jim Bean. I just prefer beer, that’s all. I have a question about spiritualists. Why do mediums use small glasses instead of pint glasses when they try to contact the spirits? …There’s a punch line somewhere but I can’t find it.

My adventures with beer have been many though Doug Coughlin, bartender extraordinaire in the film Cocktail, would take issue with my choice of brew. Coughlin was played by the roguish Australian, Bryan Brown. “Beer is for breakfast around here, drink or be gone” said the man that taught Tom Cruise how to juggle bottles and shakers. Doug was a hardcore brandy man yet I can’t believe Doug wouldn’t be impressed by someone that drank 24 cans of beer in the one session and stayed on his feet. My mate Chibber did this.  

Chibber Capone

Let’s go back on the wagon trail to Canada. I have been watching the excellent HBO TV series Boardwalk Empire. The programme is set during the prohibition period in the United States. Bootleggers ferry whiskey to thirsty patrons in speakeasies from other countries including their neighbour to the north. Canadian Club thrived in those illegal times being bought by infamous characters like Al Capone and his ilk. The constant drinking of whiskey by all the main cast does make me smack my lips. I look at my blended whisky that is as old as Hob Gadling (HG is not a brand of whisky) fermenting in the decanter before heading to the fridge for a can of cold beer.

I wonder what Mark Carney’s favourite tipple is. Maybe he sticks to the beer for breakfast outlook? Or does he gulp down $500 bottles of brandy? Canadian Club, playing the national card? Teetotal or coffee total? It can’t be cola, can it? I will request an interview with the Governor to clarify his position on this matter of the most importance.