Posted tagged ‘Man for all seasons’

Windsor’s Fall

September 24, 2012

Deep in the middle of autumn I arose from bed with a spring in my step. Throwing open the curtains I expected the seasonal thorny weather. My eyes saw the glory of a dry garden and overhead, a blue sky. With great haste I made my elaborate preparations for a comfortable stay in the back yard.

Shorts, t-shit and flip-flops were the garb of this calling. The plastic chair and table were emptied from the cluttered hall cupboard. A flask of ice-cold cola chilling from the fridge would help me from dehydration and the Kindle would hide the latest embarrassing book I am reading. Any enquiries from nosy neighbours could be met with the blatant lie, “just a little something by Prost.”

Before my adventure could start I was assailed by my wife.

“Where are you going?”

“The back.”

“It’s freezing out there. Are you crazy?”

“It’s not freezing, it’s nice. I’m going out there and you will regret not joining me.”

I set up my paradise in the garden. I idled in the idyll. It was as if a little piece of Jamaica had been transported into the sprawling urban metropolis that surrounded me. Swigging some of the brown, sugary nectar of the gods I delved back into my Dean Koontz blockbuster.

A light breeze tickled my toes, though it wasn’t a laughing matter. For once I wished I had socks under my flip-flops to ward off the slight chill in my lower extremities. As if by a switch the sky turned a shade of grey. Then a whipping current of air tore at my face. Nonplussed, I guessed this was just a passing breaking of wind.

My guess was wrong when the goose bumps sprouted from my flesh as the cold intensified. I turned round to see my wife at the window. I managed to fake a smile with my teeth chattering. Standing up to bring some heat into my body by moving, the chair was blown across the ground and rattled off the garden wall where it continued to flap. I picked up my cola and headed for the back door of the house; you never leave a cola behind.

My homeward journey was difficult as the wind was changing direction constantly. The only good thing about this was I hoped there were a lot of people playing golf today. Leaning my upper torso 30° into the wind I could fight my way to shelter.

“See. Told you it was wild outside.” said my wife.

Now this I could not stomach. For the rest of the day I did not want the “told you so” thrown down my throat at every opportunity so I had to counteract her claim.

“What are you talking about? I forgot to put on my sun cream. After I put it on I’m going back outside.”

I might not be coming back.

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