Posted tagged ‘London Fashion Week’

In Vogue

September 19, 2010

Currently taking place is London Fashion Week, a gig that lasts from Friday 17th to Wednesday 22nd of September. This is one of the Grand Slam events for designers who constantly try to outdo one another in the outrageous stakes. Crop tops, busty dresses, swimsuits, feathers and furs- real or imagined- all attired in dazzling colours parade down the catwalk. Of course, there’s a model in them as the clothes might be loud but they can’t walk by themselves.

This haute couture industry does only cater for the well off and if you can afford one of these monstrosities, I mean delicacies you have to be selective about when to wear. For the less fortunate cheaper imitations of the basic trimmings filter down to the mass market which is a good thing and a bad thing. For ladies, there’s nothing worse than turning up at an event to see a rival with the same dress on. I often wonder what the ladies do in this situation. Do they try and re-arrange their apparel? Maybe go to the little girl’s room and hem the dress up a few inches to make a micro-dress. Tear a sleeve off and use it as a makeshift bandana. Look for a “Warning: Wet Paint” sign and rub up and down or roll over the painted surface furiously. I guess I’ll never know.

As for me, I’ve never been into designer garb. Mrs W will tell you, my clothes mantra is I’ll wear anything as long as there’s no green in it. And if the garment is semi-expensive I have to take it off when I eat as I am a clumsy eater. Fine if we’re entertaining in the house, restaurants are a bit more embarrassing. Many’s the time I’ve seen couples stare at my bare torso while they dine; lust from the women and envy from the men. (Or maybe disgust and mockery, I don’t know, I’m not a body language expert)

Looking at some of the creations on show at the Fashion extravaganza, it seems to be a success all you have to be is original. Therefore, I am thinking of starting my own clothes line (nothing to do with drying the washing) and have a few prototypes ready. Denim trousers with different coloured legs could be the future of casual clothing as we know it. And to boot, why not wear different footwear, too? Even Naomi Campbell wouldn’t trip over with odd trainer’s on, now would she? Mind you, she has two left feet.