Posted tagged ‘Chocolate’

The ad’s have it, the ad’s have it

December 27, 2009

Recently I have been bombarded with advertisers wanting to promote their products on this page. Blogger has a facility in its software to enable Adsense. This monetary function has captured the hearts of many bloggers and their page is cluttered up with branded wares.

So far I have rejected out of hand this easy way to make money because I have got scruples (sounds like something contagious, doesn’t it?) and abhor product placement in TV shows, films etc. One more thing that is off-putting is I would have no control over these adverts. Heaven knows what could appear. If on the other hand I had a say on what is being endorsed I might be persuaded to sponsor an ad or two but Blogspot rejected my idea. Apparently Rangers and Queen are not high on their list of hits and I don’t suppose many would click on a Nacho Novo link.

Another problem with adverts is that they would be more interesting than the blog itself. I mean let’s face it, if a photo of George Clooney with a Savile Row suit was at the side of this page you wouldn’t be reading this babble. But like the good old BBC I have declined the overtures of the commercial market.

Some TV adverts are brilliantly made and are a kind of art. I always liked the Milk Tray adventure. A James Bond type guy would run a gauntlet of dangerous missions to deliver the chocolate to a beautiful woman while the tagline read all because the Lady loves Milk Tray. When I was young I imagined I was the guy and believe it or not I grew up to be that man; my dreams came true.
Let me explain.
This was a poem I published originally on My Telegraph. A tale of my wife’s gnawing hunger for chocolate. I don’t like repeating (unlike the good old BBC) but this might be new to some. Milk Tray Man, eat your heart out.


So I’m leaping down the stairs
Four at a time
Pushing neighbours out of the way
Only one thing on my mind
Out on the road I run
Linford without the lunchbox
Grunting like a Sharapova forehand
As I hare it down the block
Turn the corner, the local shop is closed
In my tracks I froze
Gotta get a bus!

The bus is full and I don’t get a seat
I’m out of breath and have sore feet
My spirit is diminished
Will this mission be accomplished?
I get off at the high street stop
Run again to the candy shop

At the shop there’s a huge queue
This ordeal is hurting me thru and thru
Then I forget what she wanted
My mind’s a blank; I’m haunted
Was it Snickers or Milky Way?
Was it Galaxy or Milk Tray?
Was it Black Magic or Bounty?
I can’t think for the life of me
Was it a Mars Bar or a Star Bar?
Was it Rolo or Aero?
Crunchie or Munchies?
Toblerone, Kit Kat or Yorkie?
How can I get out of this quandary?
If I take her back a Toffee Crisp
She will give me a Glasgow kiss

I’ve got it! This will make her day
You can’t go wrong with Ferrero Rocher

As a wise man once said “Chocolate is chocolate is chocolate” and all’s well that ends well. I was thinking of ending with a George Clooney photo but here’s something far more fulfilling.

Break out the bubbly and choccies if that’s your poison. As for me, I will be having a few drams to go with my beers. Happy New Year to everyone when it comes. I hope in 2010 all your dreams come true.