Circumventing codes causing chaos

We’ve all heard the expression the cheque’s in the post. Normally, this means the cheque’s not in the post. Taking it further it means the person in debt is defaulting on his payment. At some point or another we have all experienced that awful moment when we know we have been ripped-off. You know what I’m talking about. You give someone a loan of money and they keep it. Or you buy from a mail order firm and they don’t send the goods. Sometimes you just have to accept that you can be a loser in some transactions. This is tough as money makes the world go round, though I think that’s not entirely true as gravity plays a big part.

Ordering online has always worried me. Don’t get me wrong reputable sites like Amazon have a 100% record with items that I have ordered, it’s just that I don’t trust that little padlock that says, don’t worry your card details are safe here. Padlocks can be opened if you have the right key. Or to be more precise as we are talking softwarish, if you have the right encryption code.

Hacking is another word that has been brought back into fashion under a new guise. Previously, a hacker was a not very good footballer whose job was to kick the opposition’s best player. Being a bit of a ball player myself (he says, pure utterly big-headedly) I used to hate the hackers on the field. Now I hate the hackers in the cyber world. These malicious malcontents can steal your identity. They can rob from your bank account without holding up the staff, wearing a mask or having a fast getaway car. I always wondered what would happen if more than one hacker stole your identity because there are more than one hacker out there. Be good if they all met one another.

“I’m Spartacus.”
“No you’re not. I’m Spartacus.”
“You are all having a laugh. I’m Spartacus.”
“I am the real Spartacus.”

Before you know it all these thieves would be left high and dry. With so many fraudsters kicking about they’d be easy to spot.

Passport control would say “We’ve got another one here trying to leave the country and go to the Canaries. Call for the Security service. He must be mad.”

Younger hackers hoping to pull off an under age tattoo stunt would be pierced with the legend. “You’re the fiftieth punter wanting an All the Days of Dolores inking. Clear off.” Pause. “Nice ears, though.”

Then there’s the foreign expatriate hackers that try to set up fish and chip shops in the U S of A. “We only do burgers here, you phony.”

Attempting to hire out library books fraudulently would be met with the contemptuous “You want to read Ceri Radford? You must have a fake ID or you‘re looking for a door stop.”

All these Spartacus’ roaming the continents and feeling disgruntled with the world can only lead to one thing: Revolution. Will the real Spartacus stand up?

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17 Comments on “Circumventing codes causing chaos”

  1. Hee Ho JW, exceeding clever! yet true and worrying. (Specially Spartacus In the Flesh).

    Elderly fella in the paper here today sent out zillions in claim fees to various people, before realising he hadn't after all won the prizes they said he had. EVIL fraudsters – may their choicest parts be hacked off very very slowly

  2. JW10 Says:

    Now that would be painful.
    In a previous incarnation maybe you were part of the Spanish inquistion, Dolores. But you're right all the con men should be punished.

    In my inbox at the moment is an e-mail telling me to click this link and I will make squillions of pounds. I'm tempted. I told my wife and she said “what will we do about all the begging letters?”
    I said “Don't worry, we'll still keep sending them.”

  3. Expat Says:

    You mean I shouldn't have sent that $10,000 to that nice man in Nigeria?

  4. Yeah Thanks Expat – arrived safely

  5. JW10 Says:

    Hello philanthropist Expat.

    Dollars are no use to me. Wire me £20,000. Thanks.

  6. I'd have been seriously pissed off if I'd been Spartacus. Yes, I know Spartacus was a seriously pissed-off kind of guy, and with good cause.

    But at the very end, when the victorious Romans asked for Spartacus to stand up, it only needed ONE Spartacus to stand up and be crucified!

    And all those trees would have been saved…

  7. I'd have been seriously pissed off if I'd been Spartacus. Yes, I know Spartacus was a seriously pissed-off kind of guy, and with good cause.

    But at the very end, when the victorious Romans asked for Spartacus to stand up, it only needed ONE Spartacus to stand up and be crucified!

    And all those trees would have been saved…

  8. It's bit like the above, when Blogger runs amok,

    “I'm Blogger”

    “No, I'm Blogger”



  9. Expat Says:

    Since you've mentioned,um, bloggers, CI…thanks heavens for JW!

    You and Dolores are sadly missed. Is this some demonic plot to get me to start a blog?

  10. Yes Expat, Thank hugely Heavens for JW!
    I'm certainly not-Blogger at the moment – shopping lists are current limit – but how Splendid it would be if demonic plot worked on you starting…

  11. JW10 Says:

    Expat, I've been waiting two years on your moonshine blog. Go on give it a go.

    I enjoy writing blogs and post on other places (I try to keep the good ones for you guys) so as not to swamp the place. Would love to see new blogs from such esteemed contemporaries (hark at me).

    DD, when next you post you'll find a new blogger dashboard. It took me a while to get used to it. There's lots of new things in there.

  12. Expat –

    Perhaps we are all JW!

    Perhaps JW is really Dolores who is a nom de plume for both of us. That would explain everything.

  13. So here is a song from Youtube that is dedicated to changes – and everybody changing places…


  14. expat Says:

    I wish I had the time to do a blog. I would love it…being in control and all that. The dominatrix in me would come to the fore! And I would want to blog every day! Blabbermouth, that's me. But seriously, work consumes me (says she, who started writing at 7 am and is just winding up for the day but will be checking e-mails until midnight). If I didn't love what I do, it would be a chore, but for the most part it's a joy.

  15. Oh Expat, please find some time to unleash your Dominatrix – 'twould be a joy for all of us!

  16. Expat – that describes me too! And there was only one other person I knew who was more passionate about their work, and more hard-working, than me. And wow, were we a team…

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